How to honor your introverted child’s temperament

I have been an introvert my whole life. I am middle-aged now, so I feel that makes me somewhat of an expert on introverted things. When I was growing up, the word introvert was not the mainstream concept it is today. My parents always said I was shy and sensitive. They raised me to think that these were qualities of my personality that needed to be overcome, not embraced.

I spent my childhood, teens, and young adult years trying to be more social, outgoing, and tougher. I don’t blame my parents for this. They didn’t know that what they were doing was detrimental and I know that they were trying to help me.

That being said though, If you are a parent reading this, I implore you not to make your introverted child feel the way I did growing up. They deserve you to accept, embrace and be proud of who they are innately. I hope that this blog will help you to do that.

“I was not the kind of kid you could say go to your room

as a punishment, because my room was heaven to me,

my isolation was welcome.”

-Jim Carrey

Special traits of your introvert child

-Introverted children have a very well-developed inner world. They are born with a strong inner guidance system. They will often look within for guidance and not outside themselves for support or guidance.

– Bright and curious about the world. They want to know about everything in their world on a deeper level. (My favorite thing when I was a kid was my best friend’s family’s set of encyclopedias. I had so many questions that I found I couldn’t get answered, so the encyclopedias were amazing to me!)

– Possess wisdom beyond their years and they can step outside themselves and reflect on their behavior. This is not something all children can do. In my experience, I’m not sure it is something most adults can do.

– Observers. They prefer to watch something first and then try it. They don’t like to jump right into something. Which means they are less likely to engage in risky behaviors.

-Make decisions based on their likes and values. They choose their music, books, shoes, clothes, and hobbies and they could care less if it’s what’s popular. This quality makes them less likely to succumb to peer pressure.

-Thinkers, creators, and problem-solvers. They try hard to understand human nature and try to figure out what makes someone tick.

How you can nurture your introverted child

-Being an introvert means that you gain energy from spending time alone. So make sure that you don’t overschedule your child. Allow them plenty of time at home, where they can play and do activities solo.

-Space out activities and social times throughout the week with free days at home between them. This will give them time to recharge.

-Know that your child may have only one or two friends and that this is perfectly normal. They are never going to be social butterflies with tons of friends. It is important to let them know that you think this is okay too.

-They are deep thinkers so encouraging reading, taking them to museums, and visiting art galleries are all amazing ways to nurture your young introvert.

– Our society is a lover of extroverts, so it is important as a parent to counterbalance this bias by helping your child feel comfortable with who they are. To let them know that about 40% of people in the world are introverts and that they are wonderful and special.

-Share with them all the special traits that they possess because they are an introvert.

-They like to assess and observe a situation before they join in. Let them do this instead of pushing them into an uncomfortable position, which may make them dislike something before they have even given it a try.

-Many children who are introverts are also highly sensitive. These two qualities oftentimes go hand in hand. This sensitivity should be nurtured and encouraged because it is one of the things that makes them special. This sensitivity also correlates with artistic ability. An artist must be sensitive to create art. That’s why many introverts are also extraordinary artists, musicians, actors, writers, dancers, etc…

I hope that this blog will help you to honor your introverted child’s temperament. You are very lucky to have this special soul in your life. Our world needs more deep thinking, reflective and artistic people in it. So let’s nurture and support the little ones who were born to do just that!

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