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Find Your True Purpose Now

What would the world look like if everyone was living their true purpose? I believe it would be a much better place than the world we are living in now. I think many of the problems our world has today are because people are lost. They are floundering and not connected to their purpose or passion.

We all have a purpose for being here. However, most people follow the social norms, which are getting good grades, getting into college, getting a good job, buying a house, and starting a family. Most parents encourage a path of safety, instead of encouraging their children to go after their dreams and passions. It makes me sad that parents do this to their children.

Dreams and passions are what make life worth living. It’s what gets us out of bed in the morning and if you are lucky enough to have a dream then those who love you should encourage and nurture it, instead of trying to talk you out of it. Many children are so afraid of disappointing their parents that they don’t think pursuing their dreams is even an option.

I have always nurtured and encouraged my children’s dreams. My son is a musician/writer and my daughter is an actress. Believe me, it has not been easy for them. Most people are not supportive of people who pursue the arts and things outside the social norms. I am very proud of them for standing against this mindset and for having the courage to go after their dreams.

What if you throw out what society deems acceptable and what your family thinks? And instead follow your internal compass without any need for outside validation. This is the headspace you need to adopt to find your true purpose in this world. This blog is full of information to help you find out who you are meant to be. You deserve to be excited about your life and to feel like you are fulfilling your destiny!

“There is no greater gift you can give or receive than to honor your calling. It’s why you were born. And how you become most truly alive.”

Oprah Winfrey

true Purpose questions:

When do you feel most alive?

What are you good at?

What are your hobbies?

What does success mean to you?

When do you feel happy?

What are the things that you value in life?

What are your true needs?

What gets you out of bed in the morning?

What did you like doing as a child? Your eight-year-old self didn’t care about money or social standing. You just played and had fun. When you are pursuing your dreams and passions it feels like you are playing. It is enjoyable, fun, and makes you feel good.

What makes you lose track of time?

What can you offer the world that will make a difference?

When have you felt most fulfilled?

What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail?

What would you do if you didn’t have to worry about earning a living?

What makes you angry? If you’re angry it means your passionate. Maybe you could use this anger to fight for something you believe in?

Roadblocks to true purpose:

Limiting Beliefs

We all have that voice in our head that is not always encouraging. It is fueled by our fear of failure and low self-esteem. This is often what holds us back from pursuing our true calling. If you can quiet it and believe that there are no limits to what you can do, then you will have an easier time finding your purpose. Check out my Self-Esteem blog for some help with your limiting beliefs.

Staying in Your comfort zone

We’ve all heard that to grow we need to get out of our comfort zone. This is also required to find our true purpose. To pursue our destiny we may have to leave the place where we feel safe and at ease for a while. This place keeps us from getting hurt, but it also keeps us in jobs we hate, in unhealthy relationships, and also from finding our purpose.

"Something about the social pressures of adolescence and professional pressures of young adulthood squeezes the passion out of us. We're taught that the only reason to do something is if we're somehow rewarded for it. And the transactional nature of the world inevitably stifles us and makes us feel lost or stuck."
-Mark Manson

Helpful Exercises:

Jack Canfield’s Joy Review

Jack Canfield, Co-Author of Chicken Soup for the Soul and motivational speaker has a great exercise that is helpful when searching for your purpose. You sit down for 30 minutes and write down all the times you’ve felt the greatest joy in life. It is an amazing tool for honing in on what your passions are and what makes you happy.

Conduct a Passion Test

This test was developed by Chris and Janet Attwood, co-authors of the book The Passion Test, The Effortless Path to Discovering Your Life Purpose.

Step 1: Brainstorm Your List – By completing the sentences below with a different activity.

When I was a kid I dreamed of ________.
I can’t pass up a book or movie about ________.
If I played hooky from work for a week, I’d spend the time ________.
Most people don’t know this about me, but I really enjoy ________.
I am the go to person when my friends need help with ________.
If I could star in my own How-to TV show, it would be about ________.
If I were to make a homemade gift, it would involve ________.
I’ve tried it only once or twice, but I really enjoyed it ________.
The closest I come to a runner’s high is when ________.
If I won first prize in a talent show, it would be for ________.

Now that you have your list, it’s time to whittle it down.

Ask yourself if you had to choose between the first and second activities which one seems more appealing to you? Picture yourself doing both and then pick the one that makes you feel the happiest. Then take that activity and compare it to the third activity and do the same thing. Work your way down the list until you are left with the activity that gives you the most joy – that is your number one passion. Now go through the list four more times until you have your top five passions.

Hopefully, the questions and exercises above will help you to successfully find your life’s purpose. Once you know what it is you will be able to begin the wonderful journey of fulfilling your destiny!

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learn easy visualization techniques to make your dreams come true

Audra McDonie / Self-Help / 1 Comment

“Everything you can imagine is real.”
Pablo Picasso

We all have dreams that haven’t come true yet. There are goals yet to be achieved, and experiences that we would like to have, but as of yet have not shown up in our lives. This could be because many of us (me included) are very good at visualizing the life that we don’t want. We spend a lot of time imagining worse case scenarios and worry about what could happen in the future. Visualization is an amazingly powerful tool that will bring all of the positive outcomes that we want to fruition.

Visualization is a tool that athletes use that helps them to excel in their chosen sport. Many Olympic athletes have used it to carry away a gold medal. There has been a lot of research done on visualization. One finding showed that imagining a task before doing it, drastically improves performance when the task is actually done.

According to JackCanfield.com, visualization techniques have four very important benefits:

Activates your creative subconscious.
Programs your brain so it can recognize the resources you need to achieve your dreams.
It activates the law of attraction, which draws into your life the people, resources and circumstances that you need.
Builds internal motivation, so you can go after your dreams.

The best times to practice visualization is when you first wake up, after meditation or prayer and right before bed.

Steps to Visualization

Step #1: The most important part of visualization is to know what you want. We all have a mish-mash of dreams, aspirations, goals and experiences that we want running around in our heads. We need to organize our thoughts concerning what we actually want to bring into our lives. What brings us joy and peace? Another good question to ask yourself is if I had nothing holding me back, what would I want to see in my life? or If a genie showed up and could make anything happen in my life, what would my life look like?

Step #2: This is where you write down and describe what you want in detail. You need to have a clear vision.

Step #3: Start visualizing and create the emotions. Start envisioning that you have the life you just wrote about. See it, what do you hear? What do you smell? What does it feel like? Imagine you are walking through this new life as if it were actually real. Get excited and feel all the wonderful emotions that come with having the life you always dreamed of.

Step #4: Take daily Actions. Each day think about one thing that you could do that would help you to get closer to the life that you want.

Step #5: Persevere. In life we will always be faced with challenges that we have to overcome. Visualize yourself overcoming all obstacles that get in your way.

create goal pictures

Create a photo or visual representation of you with your goal, as if it were already completed. For example if you want to go to Egypt and see the Pyramids, then take a picture of you and put it in next to a picture of the pyramids. If you want to own a house, put a picture of you next to the house you want. You get the idea. The goal picture gives your mind something concrete to hold onto and is beneficial to the process.

visualization index cards

Write each goal/dream/experience/material thing that you would like to see in your life and write it on an index card. Keep them on your bedside table and each morning and night go through the cards one at a time. Read a card, close your eyes and see the goal completed perfectly for about 15 seconds. Open your eyes and then repeat the process with the next card. You can also incorporate your affirmations with the visualization cards. If you would like you can read my blog on affirmations here: Try Affirmations for Health, Wealth and Happiness.

I hope that these visualization techniques will help you on your road to living the life of your dreams. Remember we all deserve to live our absolute best life, and it never hurts to see if something new might be just what we need to achieve it. Take care of yourself and know that you deserve all that is good!

8 Life lessons you can learn from Your cat

Audra McDonie / Self-Help / Leave a Comment

I am writing this blog in memory of my cat Pumpkin, who passed away last week. It was a hard week, but I gain solace from knowing that Pumpkin was seventeen and had a great life. He was also an amazing soul who lived life to the fullest. Ellie and Olive are our other cats and they are also beautiful little beings. I have learned a lot about living from watching my cats. Sometimes nature is our best teacher.

“I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior”
Hippolyte Taine

8 life lessons you can learn from your cat

Live one moment at a time. Cats know how to live in the moment. They are not worrying about tomorrow or even what they will be doing in the next five minutes. They are blissfully mindful and in the present.

2. Know instinctively that things will work out. Kitties have a faith that they will be taken care of and they don’t worry or have anxiety about living. They just live and expect the best!

3. Practice the art of doing nothing. Cats can sit and stare out the window or into space for hours and be completely content. With absolutely no guilt for not being productive.

4. Love unconditionally. They always seem to know when you’re not feeling good and are there to support and give you love.

5. Live curiously and with perception. These furry guys want to know what is going on at all times. They love to watch their humans do things and are always observant and aware of their surroundings.

6. Live life independently. Cats may live with us, but they are living their own lives. They don’t look for validation from us because they are confident in themselves.

7. Don’t fall victim to boredom. You never see a cat looking bored. They always seem very content. Whether napping, playing or staring off into space they are perfectly happy.

8. Know how to play. Cats are known for their playfulness. They are always batting at something or looking for their next adventure.

Cats are wise and spiritual creatures and I hope I was able to enlighten you on some of the ways they can teach us to live a happy and more content life. Live long and paws-prer!

The Amazing ways your child will benefit from family dinners

Audra McDonie / Self-Help / Leave a Comment

“Growing up, I learned life’s important lessons at the dinner table.”
-Chef John Besh

One of the most important things my parents ever did for my brother and I was instill the tradition of eating family dinners together. In fact, if we were all home, we ate breakfast, lunch and dinner together. It is where my parents shared their stories and wisdom and also where my brother and I shared our lives with them.

I have continued this tradition in my own home, and I feel it is one of the most important things that you can do for your children. I believe that kids feel safer in the world if they have routines and traditions that they can count on.

Unfortunately, only 30% of families eat meals together on a consistent basis. Our lives are overscheduled with school, work and extracurricular activities, which gives us no time to sit down and eat together. Some families go days or even weeks without sharing a meal!

Top 10 reasons family meals are important:

Food is more nutritious and kids tend to be less picky because they eat a wider variety of food.
It strengthens family bonds and helps build better relationships.
It gives children a sense of belonging.
Parents get a chance to be role models. They can teach their kids manners and share their wisdom. They can also teach values and traditions.
Kids have a lower chance of engaging in high risk behaviors, like substance abuse, smoking and teen pregnancy.
It makes children feel loved, safe and secure because it is a routine that they can count on everyday.
Children get to talk about their day and feel important.
Young children learn more words, which gives them a larger vocabulary.
Lower rates of depression, anxiety and eating disorders in teens and higher rates of resilience and self esteem.
According to research, 80% of teens said that dinner time is the time of the day they’re most likely to talk to their parents.

So as you can see, family dinners are very important for the health and well being of children. Also, it doesn’t always have to be dinner. Eating breakfast or lunch together is just as beneficial. You should shoot for eating meals together five times a week to reap the benefits.

Try not to get overwhelmed, it’s okay to start out slow with one meal a week and then add on from there. The important thing is that you are using the meal as a time to come together without outside distractions like the television, computer, tablet or phones. Also, keep toys and books off the table as well. Use this time to connect as a family and give your children your undivided attention.

As a mother, I feel that eating together is one of the most important things you can do as a parent. I hope that this information has inspired you to make family meals a priority in your life! Take care and Bon Appetit!

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How to feel better in your own skin

Audra McDonie / Self-Help / Leave a Comment

“I began to understand that the promises of the world are for the most part vain phantoms, and that to have faith in oneself and become something of worth and value is the best and safest course.” – Michelangelo

I feel a deep affinity with this Michelangelo quote. I spent a lot of my life trying to fit in and be what other people expected me to be. I felt disconnected from myself and not at peace. I knew I wasn’t living the life of the person that I was meant to be, which I like to refer to as my authentic or true self.

I have not reached my fullest potential and I probably never will, but that doesn’t matter to me. What’s important to me is that I am on a journey in which I am striving to be the absolute best that I can be. This gives me peace and makes me feel like I am living in harmony with myself.

The journey is not an easy one. I have had to give up bad habits and relationships that were not good for me. It also required taking the time to get to know myself, so I knew what I wanted out of my life. As Michelangelo said in his quote, “to become something of worth and value is the best and safest course.” I have found that the most important thing for me in this life is to become something of worth and value to myself. To become someone that I am proud and happy to be.

At night when my head hits the pillow, I know that I am making a real effort to be the best version of myself, and this gives me a deep sense of peace. I think there a lot of people who are just like me. People with feelings of unrest and pain because they are living life in opposition to their inner voice, which longs for them to be their best selves.

Changing yourself and becoming the person you know you were meant to be is not for the faint of heart. It is difficult and comes with its own pain, but it is a healthy pain that makes you grow. Instead of that pain of discontent that gnaws at your soul.

“Be who you were created to be and you will set the world on fire.”
-St. Catherine of Sienna

I decided to write this because making the decision to try to become the “best version” of myself was an amazing turning point in my life. I was unhappy, unhealthy and at odds with myself. Now, I have an inner life that is at peace and I feel aligned with myself -not at odds. My life is still difficult at times and there are problems and obstacles to overcome, but I have an inner peace within myself that is very rarely disturbed.

All it takes to begin this journey is to tune in to who you really are. Deep down you know who you are meant to be. When I began, I decided to give up or get away from anything that went against who I knew I was meant to be. Habits that didn’t align, People who made me feel less and activities that didn’t bring me joy – My circle got smaller and I was a lot more discriminating in everything I did. I became happier and more at peace with every decision I made that aligned with my true self. Another important aspect of my journey has been working on my spirituality. It has also made all the difference in my life. I wrote a blog last year called Something to do Daily for Your Spirit, you can read it here: https://www.introvertview.com/something-to-do-daily-for-your-spirit/

My goal in this life is to become something of worth and value to myself. Making a commitment to my higher self and becoming more spiritual is the secret to a peaceful life for me. It also is what gives my life meaning. I hope that you are able to find something in what I wrote here, that will help you on your journey. I would love to hear your thoughts – there’s a place to leave a comment at the top of this blog.

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Minimalism is the way to happiness and freedom

Audra McDonie / Self-Help / Leave a Comment

“Minimalism is a lifestyle that helps people question what things add value to their lives. By clearing the clutter from life’s path, we can all make room for the most important aspects of life; health, relationships, passion, growth and contribution.”
– Joshua Fields Millburn

Minimalism at it’s base is learning to live with less and embracing a life which is based on experiences rather than possessions. Today our lives are built around a consumer culture. We have so much stuff that 1 in 11 American households purchase self storage outside of their house and they spend on average $1000 per year storing their stuff. There is nothing wrong with material possessions, but I think there is a problem with how many we have and how much importance we place on them. Movies, tv, commercials, and pop culture impress upon us that being rich and having everything money can buy is going to make us happy beyond our wildest dreams. Go to college, get a good job so you can be “secure” and buy cars, houses, clothes, boats, jewelry, etc… We go after these things at the expense of our health, relationships, dreams and personal growth.

“Want to have a house, raise a family and have a career? Great. If these are important to you then that’s wonderful, minimalism simply allows you to make these decisions more consciously, more deliberately.”
“Minimalism is a tool to rid yourself of life’s excesses in favor of focusing on what’s important – so you can find happiness, fulfillment, and freedom.”
– Joshua Fields Millburn & Ryan Nicodemus

I have been wanting to live a minimalist lifestyle for a long time. I’ve looked into it; learning about it through documentaries, books and blogs. Last year, I was forced to clean out my office because of a leak. I got rid of anything I didn’t absolutely love and anything that I didn’t use. Other than this, I have not committed to the minimalist lifestyle. Not surprisingly though, my office is very minimalist now, and it is my favorite place in my house. Starting out slowly seems to be the way a lot of people on the minimalist path begin. There are all kinds of minimalists – some have sold all their possessions to live communally on a farm. Some have listed all their possessions on a sheet of paper, and then eliminated all but a 100 possessions. Neither one of these options would be for me, but for every person it is a process, they didn’t just wake up one day and become a minimalist. Each individual has to find the minimalist lifestyle that works for them, it is ever changing and evolves over time. The minimalist lifestyle I would like right now would consist of getting rid of all the clutter in my home and having it be full of objects I loved and things that all have a use. The best way to begin is to think of how your life would look if you had less stuff.

"Minimalism is the intentional promotion of the things we value most and the removal of anything that distracts us from it." - Joshua Becker

According to Joshua Becker the author of the book Simplify, the best way to begin is to remove all the clutter from our lives, moving from room to room. Selling, donating and recycling everything that we no longer use. He says that the simplicity and order that this brings, will bring freedom, joy and balance. Your home will start to give life and energy rather than drain it. As you clear physical clutter you begin to clear emotional clutter, relational clutter and spiritual clutter.

Marie Kondo is a minimalist expert (although she prefers “tidying expert”) bestselling author, star of Netflix’s hit show Tidying Up with Marie Kondo and founder of KonMari Media, Inc. In her book The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up, she teaches that if you simplify and organize your home the right way, you will never have to do it again.

She believes in the KonMari Method: Instead of organizing room by room, you tidy by category – not location. It starts with clothes, books, paper, miscellaneous items and then sentimental items. She believes in keeping only those things that speak to the heart, and discard items that no longer spark joy. This method places great importance on being mindful, introspective and forward looking.

6 Basic Rules of Tidying Using the KonMari Method:

Rule #1: Commit yourself to tidying up

Rule #2: Imagine your ideal lifestyle

Rule #3: Finish discarding first

Rule #4: Tidy by category not location

Rule #5: Follow the Right Order

Rule # 6: Ask yourself if it sparks joy

There are many different methods and ways to begin on the road to minimalism. It is just a matter of finding what resonates with you. I think I will be melding several of the methods I have learned to make a method of my own. I like the idea of moving from room to room within my home, and using the KonMari way of keeping things that spark joy in me and that are useful to me or my family. If it is doesn’t spark joy or isn’t useful it will get sold, donated, recycled or thrown out. I hope that I have inspired you to take a step toward a more minimalist lifestyle. Take care and have fun on your minimalist journey!

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