Audra McDonie, Author at An Introvert's View

5 fun Activities to do at home on valentine’s day (with or without a date)!

Audra McDonie / Just For Fun / 2 Comments

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner! This day can be especially hard if you’re single. You may feel like you are the only person on earth who’s not in a relationship. Well, you’ll be glad to know you can relax, because 50.2% of adults in the United States are single. So you are definitely not alone, and you should make Valentine’s Day special for yourself! Plan a solo night, or invite a friend or family member over. Valentine’s Day is all about love. Romantic love is great, but love for yourself, friends and family is just as important!

If you have a special romantic someone, there is pressure to decide what to do together on this special day. It is even more challenging this year because there isn’t as much to do. I have found some different and fun things to do at home, which hopefully will make this Valentine’s Day one to remember, no matter what your relationship status!

Light all the candles in your house, turn off all electronics and listen to music. This is my favorite! This activity can be romantic, but it can also be just kicking back with your favorite beverage by yourself or with a friend listening to your favorite music.

2. Bake a cake or cupcakes! Make your favorite flavor cake/cupcakes then decorate with every pink, purple and red sprinkle you can find. Proceed to eat it without an ounce of guilt! You deserve it!

3. Watch a Stand-up Comedy Show. This is a very underrated activity. I recently started watching stand-up comedy shows. There are many to choose from on Netflix. One of my favorites is John Mulaney, Kid Gorgeous at Radio City. He is an absolutely brilliant and hilarious comedian. Laughing is one of the best things you can do for your mental and physical health. So on this day of love, give yourself the gift of a good hearty belly laugh!

4. Research a City You Want to Visit. This is especially relevant this year because we are not able to travel as easily. If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go? Pretend you’re actually planning a trip to this place and make a board on Pinterest where you store all your info! Include your hotel, the best places to eat, hot tourist spots, museums, galleries, shops and anything else you would like to do or see while you are there. If you can dream it, you can achieve it, so go wild and plan your absolute fantasy trip! Hopefully, it won’t be long and you’ll be on your way for real!

5. Do An Online Dance Class. This is new to me. I really had no idea that online dance classes existed. This is another fun Valentine’s Day venture to do solo or with someone else. They have everything from ballet to cardio intensive. It not only gets you active, but it also teaches you a new skill! DancePlug.com offers dance classes in every type. Also, ObeFitness.com offers cardio intensive type dance classes. They offer a free trial period or a free class, so you can try it out before you commit financially. These are only two of the many that are available. An internet search for virtual dance classes will give you many different options. Go and get your groove on this Valentine’s Day!

I hope you like some of these Valentine’s Day activity ideas and that you give one or two a try! Take care and have an amazing day!

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3 amazingly simple tips to make housekeeping easier

Audra McDonie / Self-Help / Leave a Comment

“The objective of cleaning is not just to clean, but to feel happiness living within the environment.“
Marie Kondo

Housecleaning is a necessary part of living. Everyone feels better when their home is clean and organized. I have found it ‘s much easier to keep up on the chores around the house than it is to let them go and then play catch up. I have been cleaning for many years and along the way I have picked up a few things that have helped me to keep my house in pretty good shape.

1. Own only one laundry basket: This has helped me immensely with doing laundry. I used to have three laundry baskets and this was a recipe for disaster. I had a lot of clean folded laundry, but it was not put away in closets and drawers where it belonged. Instead, it was folded and stacked in my three laundry baskets! Having only one basket forces you to put the clothes in it away, because you need the empty basket for when clothes need to come out of the dryer to be folded. A simple fix that will force to to put your clean clothes away!

2. Don’t clean everything every week and make a cleaning schedule: Don’t clean everything every week. What! I know you anal retentive people out there are freaking out, but I promise you it’s not as bad as it sounds. I have a bi-weekly cleaning schedule and within those two weeks I clean everything in my house. For example: Week one I clean the bathrooms, sweep the patio and vacuum the pool. Then week two I vacuum the house, dust and mop. There are other smaller chores on my schedule too (like changing beds, cleaning the kitchen, etc…) I don’t clean anything every week and it has completely changed my life. When I cleaned everything every week, some stuff wasn’t even dirty yet! After two weeks, everything in the house is actually dirty and needs to be cleaned. My house is not pristine at all times, but I don’t care because this way of cleaning has given me so much more free time!

3. Empty the dishwasher in the morning and run it after dinner or before you go to bed: If you follow this simple rule, you will never have dirty dishes in the sink. I empty the dishwasher in the morning after breakfast and then I fill it up throughout the day. I know a lot of people who live alone don’t use their dishwasher because they feel like it is a waste of water, but actually if your dishwasher is energy star rated it only uses 3 gallons of water, versus washing the dishes by hand which uses up to 27 gallons of water. So run those dishwashers everyday and keep your sink dirty dish free!

I hope these 3 simple tips will help you to make your home more clean and organized in less time! Happy cleaning!!

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Be Artistic! It’s a great way to express your emotions

Audra McDonie / Health & Wellness / Leave a Comment

Art therapy helps people explore their inner world through creatively expressing what is going on with them emotionally. For some, it is easier to express emotion non-verbally, and that is what this unique therapy allows people to do.

Art Therapy Techniques:

Drawing
Painting
Coloring
Sculpting
Collage

The basic premise of the process is to create art, and then analyze how what you made makes you feel. You explore themes and conflicts in your art that may be affecting thoughts, emotions and behaviors. All ages of people can benefit from art therapy and it requires no special artistic ability or talent.

This therapy has been around since the 1940’s. Doctors noticed that people suffering from mental illness often did drawings and other artwork to express themselves. They then explored it as a healing technique. Art has become an important part of the therapy field.

Art Therapy Helps:

Mental disorders
Behavior or social problems
Trauma
Stress
Learning disabilities
Brain injuries
Age related issues
Substance abuse
Cancer
and more…

There are many settings where art therapy can be done, some of them include: impatient offices, private health offices, schools and art studios. An art therapy session differs from a regular art class because in an art class you learn technique and your objective is on the finished product. In art therapy, you focus on the inner experience, perceptions, imagination and feelings.

You can also do art therapy at home. It is a great self care activity. A 2016 study published in The Journal of the American Art Therapy Association, found that just 45 minutes of creative activity can reduce stress and put you in a more relaxed state. It is also a great hobby that gives you time to yourself and leaves you with something that you created. It is also a great way to get into a “state of flow” Flow is when you are so involved in what you are doing, you lose track of time. Anytime you are in a state of flow, you are more relaxed and happy.

3 Artistic Activities To Do At Home To Improve Your Sense of Wellbeing:

Draw what you feel – Realistically or abstractly. It can help you express feelings that you can’t get out in words. Draw with a pencil in a sketchbook, or go crazy and get some colored pencils or even some paint. It is really up to you how you want to express yourself!
Keep a Gratitude Journal – Write down 3-5 things you’re grateful for and then find pictures of things and places you love. (either printed from the internet or go old school and cut them out of magazines.) Make a collage around what you are grateful for with the pictures. Collaging is a great artistic outlet and the pictures you choose to add to your collage will give you insight into yourself.
Color– Coloring is relaxing and requires mindfulness and concentration in the moment. It is an excellent artistic activity to relieve stress and help you into a relaxed “state of flow.”

Here is a picture from my gratitude journal: (See? No artistic talent needed!)

I really enjoyed doing this. I was completely engrossed in the process. I even incorporated some drawings and coloring in it. It definitely relaxed me, and I didn’t think of anything else while I was doing it. I think I even got into “a state of flow.” I think art therapy is a wonderful way to become more in touch with feelings and emotions and it is something that I am going to try to do more often.

If you would like more information on art therapy or if you would like to know where to find a professional art therapist, please click here: www.arttherapy.org. to learn more at The American Art Therapy Association website.

“If I could say it in words there would be no reason to paint.”— Edward Hopper

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9 Simple Ways to Improve your Self Esteem

Audra McDonie / Health & Wellness, Self-Help / 3 Comments

Self esteem is an individual’s evaluation of their own worth. It is what you believe to be true about yourself. I’m not sure why, but we tend to be our own harshest critics. Low self esteem can negatively affect every part of your life including your relationships, your job and even your health. So it’s probably not a stretch to say, that seeing your worth and loving yourself can definitely change your life for the better. So let’s do it!

How to Improve Self Esteem

Are your thoughts True? Are the thoughts and views you are having about yourself consistent with facts and logic? It is difficult to see mistakes in your thinking because many of these thoughts are ones that you have long held and they can feel normal and factual even though they are just opinions or perceptions. Write down these self defeating thoughts and challenge them. Make yourself come up with definitive facts and reasons for the bad things you are thinking about yourself. You will be very surprised to find that you won’t be able to come up with facts for what you are thinking, and you will see there is no reason to be beating yourself up!

List Your Accomplishments: Write down everything that you’ve done in your life that you feel proud of and everything that you feel you have done well. These are facts about yourself that you can read when you need a boost of self confidence!

Create Personal Boundaries: What are your personal boundaries? Many people allow other people to treat them poorly. It is hard to feel good about yourself if you are allowing friends, family or co-workers to take advantage of or disrespect you. The first step is to define for yourself what someone crossing the line looks like to you. Then when someone crosses it, you need to know how you will respond to them. This will give you a clear idea of what you will put up with and what you won’t, then when that personal boundary is crossed you will be aware and know how to handle it. Standing up for yourself shows you have self respect and that you are your own best advocate. It will also without a doubt help you to feel better about yourself!

Exercise: I cannot say enough about exercise as a way to boost your self esteem. It’s benefits are two fold. First, when you exercise and get your blood pumping, your overall mental state will improve. Cardiovascular exercise increases endorphins, dopamine and adrenaline. These are all brain chemicals associated with feeling happy, confident and capable. They also help you feel less anxiety, stress and less physical pain. Secondly, exercise makes your body look better, thus making you feel better about yourself. Exercise gives you a lot of bang for your buck in improving the way you feel and see yourself!

Do Things That Make You Happy: We are so busy these days. We run blindly from one commitment and chore to another. It is easy to go weeks and even months without doing anything that you find fun and relaxing. Schedule a little time every day to do something that you enjoy and let it be something that is just for you. This is a great way to get to know yourself and to find out what makes you happy. It will make you a more content person and thus will make you feel better about yourself and your life.

Celebrate The Small Things You Do Well: This is very simple. At the end of each day, write down 3 things that you did well. It doesn’t have to be anything earth shattering. It could just be the cool outfit you put together for yourself, or crossing 3 things off your to do list, or the delicious chicken parmesan you made for dinner. It is just a way for you to acknowledge the good stuff you do every day, but usually just ignore. Give your self props every day, you deserve it!

Become Mindful Of Your Self Talk: Negative self talk is not good. You need to become aware of it and by doing that you can work on not believing it and then add some positive self talk to balance it out. Meditation teacher Allan Lokos says, “don’t believe everything you think, thoughts are just that, thoughts.” My father told me something when I was a teenager that changed my life. He told me my mind was just a huge computer, full of information – information goes in and thoughts are made, but my mind is just a tool, it is not my master. If you look at your thoughts as just random manufactured things made up by a computer, you probably wouldn’t take everything you thought so seriously. Use your mind as a tool, be discriminating about your thoughts and you be the master of it. This will change your life and the way you feel about yourself!

Don’t Compare Yourself To Others: I know when you look around on social media or in your own neighborhood it seems like everyone has the perfect life with no concerns or worries. Believe me when I tell you that this is a false narrative and one that will only lead to you being unhappy. Everyone has their own set of obstacles and challenges. Nobody in this thing called life gets away without things to overcome. That is what life is all about, without these, we would not enjoy when things are going great. Remember nobody has a charmed life except in the fantasy worlds of Instagram and Facebook!

Being of Service To Others: Volunteering or lending someone a helping hand takes you out of your own head. If you are busy helping someone who is less fortunate then you, it gives you a different perspective and it keeps you from thinking too much about yourself. Also when you help others it makes you feel proud of and respect yourself, which makes it easier to recognize your own worth!

I hope that this blog has given you some tools to use to help you to feel better about yourself and puts you further along the path to loving yourself. Remember you are an amazing, unique and wonderful human being who deserves all the best this life has to offer!

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The traditional way to smudge

Audra McDonie / Health & Wellness / Leave a Comment

When I began the research for this blog, I found that there was a lot written on the subject of smudging. However, the more research I did, the more I realized that a lot of the information is a watered down version of the Native American tradition. I decided I wanted to learn the traditional way the ritual is done and the reasons it is performed.

According to Steve Coyote, a Native American educator, Native Americans believe that the power of herbs and healing are the best solutions to rid the body or environment of unwanted thoughts, feelings, spirits and energy. Smudging is a ritual that is used to clear people and places of elements that are not contributing to their well being. It has been used for centuries in every Native American culture within the Western Hemisphere.

Why Do A Smudging Session?

To better the lives of people and the places they live
Bridge between higher realms, bringing in good spirits and eliminating negative and stagnant ones.
To lift away sadness, impurities, anxieties and remediate poor health, leaving nothing but peace and harmony.

Herbs Used:

Sage – Cleanses away negative energy and brings strength, clarity and wisdom
Cedar – Cleanses and purifies, eliminates bad energy within people and objects. Also helps with a connection to the spiritual world.
Sweetgrass – Carries prayers to the spirit world. Also, attracts good spirits and positive energy.

How to Smudge:

Items needed:

Large clay bowl (many beautiful ones available on Etsy)
Herbs of your choosing (Sage, cedar or sweet grass)
Wooden matches
Feather to wave smoke

Open a window to allow a steady airflow
Stay in the moment and focused
Put the herbs in the bowl and use a match to ignite them. Let them flame up for 20-30 seconds, before you put them out. Put them out by holding your hand above them to deprive them of oxygen. (blowing them out is the incorrect way to put out the flame.)
Smoke will begin to rise from the bowl, rub your hands in the smoke and then gather the smoke and bring it in to your body and rub it on yourself, especially in areas you feel you need spiritual healing. (You can also use the feather for this)
Keep praying all the while that unseen powers of the plant will cleanse your spirit.

“We were taught to look for dark spots in a persons spirit body. You have to “see” a person’s spirit body glowing around them, and where there’s dark or foggy parts you brush the smoke into those holes in the “spirit body.” This helps to heal the spirit and close the holes.”

6. Next, start to cleanse the space in the room, moving the smoke in a slow and relaxed way. Go into every corner of every room and over every item in each room.

If you want to cleanse yourself and your home of negative energy then the ritual is done and you would take the burning herbs outside and put them out in the dirt – returning them to the soil. This signifies the energy being given back to the earth and shows respect.

If you wanted to go a couple of steps further, you could do a “Light House Cleansing.” This is explained below:

You have already done the smudging ritual above with sage to drive out negativity and bad influences.
So after you extinguish the sage in the dirt outside, you would then light the cedar and cleanse your home with the cedar the same way you did with the sage.
Then extinguish the cedar outside like you did the sage.
Continue by lighting the sweetgrass and do the same cleansing process again to bring in the good influences, putting it out in the earth when you are done.
Lastly, carry a lit candle all over the house and push light into every corner.

Below is a smudging prayer that you can say before, after or during.

May my hands be cleansed that they may create beautiful things. May my feet be cleansed that they may take me where I need to be. May my heart be cleansed, that I may hear its message clearly. May my throat be cleansed that I many speak rightly when words are needed. May my eyes be cleansed that I may see signs and wonders of this world. May I and this space be washed clean by the smoke of this fragrant plant. And may that smoke carry my prayers spiraling to heaven.

I hope that this helps you to learn how to cleanse yourself and your space, and that this beautiful Native American tradition will help you to feel more happy, peaceful and positive! Smudge away!

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The best Poppy seed bread recipe

Audra McDonie / Just For Fun / Leave a Comment

This is a family recipe that I have had in my recipe box for years, but have never made. It comes from a very special cousin of my Dad’s who was an amazing baker and cook.

I have been making her Pumpkin Cookie recipe for Thanksgiving and Christmas for years. I will share that in a month or two when we get closer to the holiday season! I made the poppy seed bread this morning and it was absolutely delicious! Below is the recipe, I hope you try it and enjoy it as much as my family did!

INGREDIENTS:

3 C Flour
2 1/4 C Sugar
1 Tablespoon Poppy Seeds
1 1/2 teaspoon Salt
1 1/2 teaspoon Baking Powder
3 Eggs
1 1/2 C Milk
1 C Oil
1 1/2 teaspoon Vanilla Extract
1 1/2 Almond Extract
1 1/2 Butter Extract

Blend dry ingredients together in a bowl, then put wet ingredients in a separate bowl.

Put the dry ingredients in the bowl with the wet ingredients and mix altogether with an electric mixer for one minute.

Pour into six small loaf pans and bake at 350 degrees for 35 min. to 1 hr. (you’ll know they are done when they are lightly browned on the top and a toothpick comes out clean.)

GLAZE RECIPE:

1/4 C Orange Juice Concentrate
3/4 C Confectioner Sugar

Beat 1 minute and spoon over the hot bread!

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